— SELF CARE —

SELF CARE is about putting yourself first. Your mental, physical and spiritual health depends on making time for the things you love. There is no Self Care guide book that will tell you what is specific to you. This is an opportunity for YOU to personalize your self care and get in touch with the deeper aspects that feed you. Pay attention to what feels good, pay attention to what does not feel good. Within this ‘Paying Attention,’ you will find a routine and practice that feels right.

Making self care part of my daily routine has become the priority in my life, and practicing self care reminds me of Self Love. It is a practice I feel so many women who have PMDD struggle with, as well as women without PMDD. The burden, the weight, and the shame that comes with PMDD potentially triggers deeply destructive patterns.

Our behaviors during PMDD become uncontrollable. When we come out of these episodes we spend the next week or two picking up the pieces of our life that we shattered—only to be shattered again and again every month. The uncontrollable nature of PMDD can tear you down, break you open, and leave you feeling vulnerable and alone. Self care becomes a vitally important touch stone, and it can be what helps you find true compassion for yourself.

It is far from easy being in relationship with someone who has PMDD. It is important for those of us with PMDD and those that support loved ones with PMDD to give space, make space, and encourage self care for everyone involved.

“I Want to feel my life while I’m in it.”

It took me several years to understand how self care played into my life. With every subsequent month of PMDD, self care had to become that much greater. This was not easy.

Some of the most resilient, courageous, raw and real women I know have PMDD. This is something so clear to me as I have journeyed for so many years with PMDD. PMDD has the potential to reveal the most raw and naked vulnerability. It has been nothing short of messy.

PMDD is unkept, untamed and wildly unpredictable. This degree of unpredictability reminds me of Nature. In the end, we have no control. PMDD is much like this.

It is harsh, traumatizing and painful. It comes in waves of every degree. It is bittersweet to know the fleeting nature of life—of death and joy and pain. It is all passing.

Through years of being challenged with PMDD, years of living in suffering and isolation, self care has become a daily ritual. It is something that needs consistent reminding and nurturing.

— PRACTICES —

Early Morning Music, Warm Lemon Water & Tea time. First thing I drink a cup of warm lemon water followed by a cup of tea or coffee. Stretching in the morning~Falling into meditation. I love early mornings—the quiet, solitude, and stillness.

Abhyanga Self Oil Massage. Self Love and Grounding.

Early Morning Walks. When the air is crisp, before the day begins, I like to go outside and move my body. Remembering how blessed I am that I still have this precious body. Always giving gratitude, even on the really hard days.

Writing Positive Affirmations or Mantras to help remind myself to stay positive and feel Love within myself.

Taking Baths and lighting candles, dropping into breath through listening to music bringing me deeper into relaxation.

Jumping in Fresh Water, Alpine Lakes, Rivers, Streams, the Ocean. Let the Waters Wash me clean.

Spending time alone & with others. Living with PMDD, I have gotten very used to being alone. This is a balance, too much time alone is not healthy. I enjoy and cherish my time alone, and know how to do this very well. Learning how to self soothe and comfort my delicate parts. I have cried my eyes out numerous times in nature—alone, observing, and processing—in pain and in joy.

Deep relationships and sharing real love and connection. I have less room in my life for anything that does not feel real to me. I have only a handful of friends, but they are all diamonds. For me, it is quality over quantity. PMDD has shown me that our time here is so precious. Choose wisely how you spend it and who you spend it with. This is all a part of Self Care.

EXTRA THANKS to Nature. Nature fills all aspects of Self like nothing else. Put yourself out there. Walk, hike, connect, listen to birds, watch the animals, sit by the waters, jump naked in the rivers and streams, howl at the moon, get in touch with the stars and moon. Start asking, “who am I?” Nature is the perfect teacher and container to feel safe and free. Nature will hold you no matter what state you are in.

“We owe it to ourselves to walk in beauty and grace.”